Dear Conservatives: Stop with the "Let's Go Brandon" or We'll Have No Choice But to Disband the Democratic Party in Disgrace
Keeping it classy!
On October second something happened on a NASCAR race track that could very well lead to the end of the Democratic Party, Leftism as a movement in the United States and Joe Biden’s presidency.
A crowd of NASCAR enthusiasts were chanting “Fuck Joe Biden.” But rather than concede this inconvenient truth a reporter named Kelli Stavast told driver Brandon Brown that they were actually chanting “Let’s Go Brandon” in his honor during a televised interview.
Ever since this viral moment, “Let’s Go Brandon” has reigned as a ubiquitous Conservative catchphrase as a veiled way to say “Fuck Joe Biden.”
Everywhere you look, these profane wits, these latter day Merry Pranksters, these contemporary Andy Kaufmans are chanting, Let’s Go Brandon!
I’m not going to lie. This brilliant, stealthy rhetorical device has nearly destroyed what’s left of the American Left. It’s hard to overstate how devastating “Let’s Go Brandon” has been to Liberals such as myself.
Before “Let’s go Brandon” no one would even think about saying “fuck you” to the President of the United States. Why would they? How could they? He was the President of the United States, after all, so even if they did not agree with the Commander-in-Chief, no one would think of disrespecting the office of the Presidency by speaking of our leader in such uncouth terms.
Until “Let’s go Brandon!” that is! For the first time, Americans were loudly and proudly articulating a vigorous dislike for the leader of the opposing political party. And they were doing so via cutesy, winking wordplay, the single most effective political weapon ever devised.
“Let’s go Brandon” is killing the Left because Biden voters don’t see him as merely an exceedingly flawed politician who represented the lesser of two evils but rather a transformative figure literally sent from God to save our nation during a time of unique peril.
That’s why Biden supporters define themselves by their unthinking, slavish devotion to their all-time favorite politician. They hold boat parades in his honor, and wear baseball hats sporting his slogans and, this is going to sound crazy, but a shockingly popular conspiracy theory proposes that Joe Biden has been fighting a secret war for decades against an evil cabal of cannibalistic pedophiles made of prominent Republican politicians and entertainers.
Biden’s popularity among the left is universal and unquestioned. People don’t just support him: they see him as a man-God. Heck, you could even argue that the Democratic Party at this point is less a conventional political organization than a glorified cult utterly in thrall to a crazed narcissist who demands absolute obedience and lashes out constantly in childish, explicitly personal ways against the many people he considers his political and personal enemies do not behave according to his wishes.
Because that definitely describes the Left, and certainly not their opposition, “Let’s Go Brandon!” has the potential to annihilate my side by mocking a figure worshiped as a deity by literally everyone who voted for him.
If this “Let’s go Brandon” thing continues Biden will have no choice but to resign in disgrace rather than risk further humiliation. A president cannot perform effectively in the face of any manner of criticism from his political opponents.
Unless MAGA types take pity on us poor Liberals there will only be one party left in the United States, and that’s Trump’s Republican party.
We on the left have nothing but our God-like reverence for Joe Biden so I implore you to stop with your brilliant wordplay before there’s nothing left of us but weeping and despair.
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