I Thought I Found the Single Logical Inconsistency in the Q Conspiracy but I Was Wrong
Like all patriotic Americans, I am a die-hard believer in Q. To use a colloquialism, I am red-pilled to the gills.
Q just plain makes sense. Of COURSE, Donald Trump is secretly leading a righteous crusade against a sinister cabal made up of pedophilic Satanic cannibals who dominate the entertainment business and the Democratic party. How could that not be true?
The more you think about Q, the more sense it makes. Occam’s Razor dictates that our problems must all be rooted in a sinister cult of cannibalistic, child-raping Democrats and Hollywood bigwigs.
It might seem implausible that Trump, a seventy-eight-year-old man who eats only fast food, thinks that exercise is unhealthy, and is seemingly incapable of discretion, self-discipline, and self-control, would be able to keep his messianic true identity a zealously guarded secret known only by a coterie of patriots like myself with excellent judgment, and a keen grasp on reality. I’m talking about people like myself, the Q Shaman, Roseanne Barr, and Marjorie Taylor Greene before she sold out.
Trump is notorious for boasting endlessly and shamelessly about his accomplishments. He even boasts endlessly and shamelessly about things he didn’t do or that his political enemies did instead.
Why, then, would Trump never mention publicly, even once, that his achievements include personally freeing hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of sex-trafficked children from becoming Tom Hanks’ after-dinner snack? Why doesn’t he ever mention that his opponents aren’t just stupid and corrupt and dumb, as he insists constantly, but also guilty of unthinkable crimes against children?
It’s so weird that he’d want to lock Hillary Clinton up due to something that might have been in her emails rather than the central role she plays in a Satanic, international sex, drug, and murder ring.
Granted, Donald Trump does not seem modest. It would not be an exaggeration to say that of all of the presidents we’ve had since George Washington, he is the least modest commander in chief, a group made up exclusively of people who feel strongly they should be the most powerful person in the world.
You might wonder, for example, why, during the presidential debate, didn’t Trump play the “I’m saving children from being raped and eaten by a sinister cadre of cannibalistic Satanists with strong ties to Hillary Clinton while my opponent is an enthusiastic member of the sinister cadre of cannibalistic Satanists raping and eating children” card and then have Kamala Harris arrested onstage for her crimes against humanity?
That’s a good question. You might also ask why he didn’t play the Frazzledrip video, which the Anti-Defamation League’s website describes as “a rumored dark web snuff film showing Hillary Clinton and longtime aide Huma Abedin sexually assaulting and murdering a young girl, drinking her blood and taking turns wearing the skin from her face as a mask. The video was allegedly discovered on former Congressman Anthony Weiner's laptop (Weiner is Abedin's ex-husband) in a folder labeled "life insurance," and police officers who've reportedly seen it were so horrified that they were driven to suicide. Conspiracy theorists have pointed to the video, which does not actually exist, to support long-standing conspiracy theories that politicians, celebrities and other "elites" sexually abuse children and consume their remains.”
First, I object to the ADL's claim that the video does not exist. It does exist, and I have seen it. It is some rough stuff. Okay, I haven’t seen it, but I know somebody who has. Okay, actually, I don’t know somebody who has seen it, but I read about it online, and it seems, if anything, too plausible.
I’m sure that Trump had advisors counseling him to lead with something like, “I save the children, you rape and eat babies,” but he’s not going to give the game away so easily. There’s a reason it’s a secret war. That’s because you’re not supposed to know about it.
Trump similarly seems incapable of remaining on message or exercising self-restraint or self-control. If Trump cannot keep himself from calling Kamala Harris and Joe Biden “dumb” and “low IQ” and endlessly re-litigating the 2020 presidential election in a way that suggests he has a pathological, deeply unhealthy, and borderline psychotic obsession with failure, then how can he refrain from ever mentioning, even once, his most impressive achievement: bringing down an evil cabal of Satanic, cannibalistic kiddy diddlers?
A year or two back, I became briefly obsessed with a weirdly ubiquitous meme that paired images of Rowan Atkinson looking alternately foolish in his Mr. Bean garb and smart with a snappy outfit and stern expression accompanied by the priceless advice, “Act Like a Fool, Think Like a Brilliant.”
The idea is to trick people into underestimating you by behaving like a buffoon and then secretly being a genius.
That is Trump in a nutshell.
Despite my fierce Q convictions, I will be the first to concede that on the surface Trump might seem petty and vain, ignorant and bullying, xenophobic and hateful, devoid of empathy or dignity, racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, and anti-semitic, childish, immature, vengeful, deluded, narcissistic, arrogant, out of touch with reality, amoral to the point of being sociopathic, disrespectful, cruel, stupid and deeply contemptuous of the values our nation was founded upon.
Trump is able to work behind the scenes to save the children precisely because nobody thinks that someone who appears to be such a bloated, worthless sack of shit could be accomplishing miracles in secret.
So while it might seem like there may be a single logical flaw in the Q conspiracy that’s not actually the case.
Trust the plan, patriots, and NEVER doubt The Man.
Nathan needed expensive, life-saving dental implants, and his dental plan doesn’t cover them, so he started a GoFundMe at https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-nathans-journey-to-dental-implants. Give if you can!
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