Loony Libs Have Turned Turkey Day into Twerky Day and i Don't Like It At All! — It Turns Out the Naming Rights! Membership Option Was For Real and Someone Is Now Five Hundred Bucks Poorer Presents Nat

Call me old-fashioned if you must but when I think of Thanksgiving, I think of turkey with all the trimmings, mashed potatoes, gravy, stuffing and spending time with family and loved ones.

That’s how Thanksgiving used to be back when America was still great. Then the loony libs had to go and ruin it the way they have ruined everything else.

Thanksgiving looks very different now. Wholesome, All-American Turkey Day has turned into Twerky Day.

Instead of gathering around the dining room table to feast and appreciate life’s blessings the Woke crowd insists that every family in America watch silently and appreciatively while a drunken, drug-fueled drag queen twerks for hours.

If someone has the audacity to suggest that maybe twerking isn’t an appropriate Thanksgiving activity, particularly when young children are around, they are immediately “cancelled” by the thought police.

They’d instantly lose their jobs, reputations and families and have to register as a homophobe everywhere they go.

THAT is how crazy, mixed up and backwards things have gotten.

Instead of family members taking turns saying what they’re thankful for that year folks are now expected to say why they hate Whitey and see America as the Great Satan.

At these unAmerican abominations Osama Bin Laden’s Letter to America is read aloud. Revelers must then say why they agree with it or be deemed Islamophobic.

Call me a “hater” and an “old fogey” if you must but i think this guy is a bad dude.

Then, after dinner people who identify as cats—which, sadly but predictably makes up about sixty percent of Generation Z—take turns using a giant, foul-smelling litter box put up just for the occasion.

It’s fucking nuts, is what it is. The young people have gone too far! I don’t like it one bit.

Now you might be saying at this point that literally nothing that I have written is true and that I am making up a wholly fictional scenario solely for the sake of being mad about it.

That obviously is not true. I’ve seen the kids on TikTok doing all of these things with my own eyes so I know what I’m talking about. Well, technically I didn’t see any of that stuff on TikTok but I seem to recall Matt Walsh talking about it in a Youtube clip? Or not?

Let’s not get bogged down in minor details like whether or not what I’ve written is true. What’s important is that it feels like it might be true and validates my dim view of young people and the radical left.

So be a rebel this Thanksgiving. Don’t invite a drag queen to twerk angrily at your children, pet and spouse. Don’t let visitors urinate or defecate in a litter box. Don’t talk about why you hate Whitey or consider America the great Satan. And DON’T read Osama Bin Laden’s Letter to America aloud. Granted, he had a LOT of good ideas but for the most part he was a bad guy.

Instead enjoy a nice turkey dinner with your family. The crazed cultural Marxists who run our largest corporations and the federal government will fucking hate it, and you, and those are exactly the kind of enemies you want to have.

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